Secretly Serviced

I don’t understand the furore around Obama’s secret service handlers being (ahem) secretly serviced by Colombian hookers.

To writers like myself who specialise in salacious analogies, the incident was a gift. To the rest of the press, who don’t normally get to write about such matters, it was an excuse to shoot off pent-up sexual frustration. So I can understand the press pushing the story just the way Bill Clinton pushes expensive cigar cases (enthusiastically, by all accounts).

The worry, apparently, is the potential to compromise the President’s security. Rep. Peter King, chairman of the House committee that oversees the Secret Service, says the key question is whether the prostitutes could have accessed “any data or information that could have compromised the president of the United States or made an enemy force aware of the practices and procedures of the Secret Service.”

But surely this applies to all sexual relationships, not strictly ones for money? Surely prostitutes are absolutely the safest kind of liaisons? After all, why would a foreign agent trying to sequester intelligence information try and charge the American agent for sex? If you were setting a honey trap, why would you create some barrier to entry, such as a fee? There’s playing hard to get, and then there’s playing easy to brush off, and that would be the latter.

And certainly there does not appear to have been any breach of security, or danger to the President’s life. The agents were on their downtime, spending their own money. So isn’t this really a personal matter for betrayed spouses?

Doesn’t the government have better things to worry about than the sexual conduct of their employees? Like — oh I don’t know — the $15 trillion national debt? Or spiralling long term unemployment? Certainly there is no suggestion that any of the women involved were forced, or were trafficked.

The outburst that comes to mind comes from Janet “Big Sis” Napolitano who claimed their actions were “inexcusable”. Really? Engaging in consensual sexual acts for money is inexcusable, but blowing up innocent women and children in drone strikes in Pakistan is just fine?

These sentiments just seems like encroachment by big government into the sex lives of individuals. Here’s some news for you Sec. Napolitano: men sometimes like having sex with hookers. Hookers like the money. Voluntary transactions between consenting adults make the world go round.

Deal with it.

39 thoughts on “Secretly Serviced

  1. Pingback: Guest Post: Secretly Serviced » A Taoistmonk's Life

  2. Does it make you moral if you don’t partake in an activity because the state says it is wrong and illegal? You cannot make people moral so there is no point to have the government try to enforce morality. Stick to treating people equal before the law and enforcing contracts. If you are single and can resist those women, well, then you have something to be proud of. If the state puts a gun to your head and stops you, well, then you don’t even have the opportunity to be moral.

  3. Pingback: Guest Post: Secretly Serviced

  4. I have been thinking of a response. Thank the Lord for Google!

    Matt 7:2-5 “For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged [if we judge with an evil heart or dark intent, His judgment of us will reflect it; if we judge nobly with honesty and justice, His judgment of us will reflect that, too], and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you [if we use extremes or exaggerations or other ignoble means, His judgment of us will reflect it and judging with fairness and compassion will garner likewise in His judgment of us]. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye [point out his sins, “minor” in Jesus’ example here] and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye [our own sins, even and especially those we will not admit, magnified by our selective blindness]? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ [tell him of his “minor” sins] when all the time there is a plank in your own eye [that there are greater or the same sins in our own lives which we do nothing about or think we are above]? You hypocrite* [pointing out the sins of others while by pretense thinking of ourselves as above sin], first take the plank out of your own eye [sincerely ask the Lord for forgiveness and learn and live the Truth and Light by His Word], and then you will see clearly [be in a righteous position] to remove the speck from your brother’s eye [to judge and to help him out of his bondage to sin].” At Galilee, the Decapolis, Jerusalem, Judea and the region across the Jordan, Jesus was talking to the multitudes gathered there after hearing of His message and of His healings to beseech them to not become like the pharisees and hypocrites who think they are above sin.

    The Secret Service could have been funded by the “War on Drugs” Budget to go deep undercover. How many Gonzo drug kings would have spilled the beans during their “Pillow Talk”.

    In Australia Prostitution is Legal. How else will we encourage Asians to travel to Melbourne instead of Macau. A Craps table is a Craps Table. It is what you do with your winnings at the end that matters to these Gamblers. Now you know why the Aussie dollar is s strong. We export Caucasian girls to Asian men. If you know your history a lot of Prostitutes came to Australia to service the men pulling out 1kg gold nuggets during the 1900’s Gold rush.

    I don’t condone Gambling or Prostitution. It is a lazy way to make a living. But Aziz is right. A Gold Digger ranks lower than a Prostitute on morality stakes.

        • So is it really the case then that a lot of conservatives (let’s say Rick Santorum for the sake of argument) are not opposed to big government, so much as they are opposed to the big modern state which they see as a challenge to the authority of the traditional (i.e. church) hierarchy?

          I’ve heard this quote passed around a lot recently:

          Hold fast to the bible as the sheet anchor of your liberties

          Ulysses S. Grant

          The trouble is, the bible is such a big and ambiguous document (e.g. Romans 13) that support in it can be found for almost anything.

          I am a Christian, but I do not believe imposing my religious values on anybody else, and I believe in big churches even less than I believe in big government.

      • What a great government He is. He gave me everything, never forced me to pay any taxes, and whether I want to follow His laws is completely up to me. That is the greatest government ever! If only they were all like that!

  5. After all, why would a foreign agent trying to sequester intelligence information try and charge the American agent for sex? If you were setting a honey trap, why would you create some barrier to entry, such as a fee?

    Since this seems totally unreasonable and unlikely, I’d bet this is exactly where a skilled conman would deploy his resources.

  6. It’s the non secret secrets: The hooker SHE spys …. ha ha ha.

    Had read many novels about such. Especially the Romantic fictions.

    The secret service guys are all about ultra male testosterone, money and power. They are doubtless the prime target for the hookers. Dah? Who doesn’t know? The U.S government or Obama? Perhpas Obama doesn’t because he loves his wife and never cheated. lol

      • Sure! For example, there many Chinese beauties in this secret service profession. They are not the best potshots but also excel in martial arts too.

        But to the ultra male secret service guys, spy in hooker’s disguise are just perfect to handle them to take them down and squeeze out pieces of information from them by seductive measures. 😉

  7. Proof Zero Hedge commentors are idiots! They don’t even realise John wrote it. But he got over 10,000 reads well done on Tabloid journalism. Now you are thinking. P.S. John write an article for our favourite bogan lad mag. That will reach the masses –

    You just sumarized American government ethics perfectly Tyler “Engaging in consensual sexual acts for money is inexcusable, but blowing up innocent women and children in drone strikes in Pakistan is just fine?” Quote of the year!

  8. And again!!

    Thu, 04/26/2012 – 09:39 | 2376341 i-dog
    “This post and photos should be beneath this site.”

    Indeed…they don’t go well together … too many words!

    Tyler: Get the guest poster to can the verbiage and add more photos!

    • I hope this site never becomes like that. That would really suck. I am very happy with the kind of commenters that this site generally attracts; we are a thoughtful and open-minded bunch who listen to each other instead of degenerating into name-calling.

  9. Last post on this. Once people realise they can’t predict the market they will abandon Zero Hedge and migrate to Philosophcal sites like this.

    It just takes time for people to wake up.

  10. Pingback: Secret Service agents busted because they refused to pay hooker: source - ALIPAC

  11. It is a shame that even the presidents men have turned to prostitution. They are suppose to have some of the best jobs in the country. How are children suppose to be inspired to become someone like them when they are doing stuff like this. We can thank German influence for this too. Prostitution is legal in Germany and they say it stimulates their economy. They even tax it. Is this event of our Secret Service men a hint of what Obama wants to do?

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